Otherwise known as 'Editor's Eye' or 'Can't believe I like reading this'.
I'll start off by saying my parents accidentally got this for me. They didn't know they were romance novels. They thought it would be a bit of nice, fun reading.
This definitely has all of the stereotypical things you look for in a romance novel; the action and bad guy come at the end, but they do come.
If you don't like the romance part of a romance novel, then don't read this. You'll get sick after sixty pages.
Still, I had fun reading it.
Until my editor's eye came out and started highlighting words like, 'whereas' and grammar mistakes. It really ruins publicized fan fiction. Which is what I call this type of thing. Here's the plot...
Lizzy and Darcy just got married; wedding night, enough said; Lizzy starts to settle into being the Mistress of Pemberly; they grow even closer; Christmas happens, Lizzy meets a bunch of nice people; they go to an interesting masked ball, where Lizzy gets propositioned; Darcy teaches Lizzy to drive a some sort of carriage like thing, they get in a fight; later Lizzy starts behaving badly; Darcy has to go out on important estate business on the day Lizzy starts feeling better; she goes out to pick strawberries, and gets propositioned by the same man at the ball again, so she hits him over the head and flees; she gets scared by a turkey and falls, hitting her head and becoming unconscious; When she is found and attended to by a doctor, they discover that she was pregnant and may have lost the baby; turns out everything is okay, she's still got the baby, and it ends with a sort of happy/totally sickening happily ever after story.
The next one I didn't even finish these two weeks. It was more of the happy happy joy joy total sloppy happily ever after stuff. I didn't even get to the part where Lizzy and Darcy get attacked before I picked up a new book.
(Really new, it came in the mail and I put Loving Mr.Darcy down immediately. The book is The Brilliant Book of Doctor Who 2011, and I am in love.)
The problem is that I like the Darcy Saga. I really do. When ever my mind wants to take a break and just relax, the series is the first novel I reach for; it's mind numbing in a not as disgusting as Twilight way!
I'll explain the term 'publicized fan fiction' now. Fan Fiction, if you've read it before or expanded beyond the ones that I throw up here.
Sometimes, it's really, really good. It's got a great plot line (Neil Gaiman), has witty conversation (Terry Pratchett), and is well written (Jane Austen). Other times, you want to pull your eyes out though your ears because it has a horrible plot line(twilight), boring conversation(twilight) and is poorly written(twilight). Most of the time it falls on the gray scale.
This one is so far to the left of the grey scale that you'll find yourself enjoying it. It has NO plotline, sickenly sweet dialogue, and is...written. I picked up mistakes like in Twlight, but...this one is written like she was talking instead of writing; it's not formal, but it's readable. I'm having trouble discribing it.
It falls under the section of fanfiction because the main characters were orginally Austen's, but Lathen has altered them to the point that you wouldn't recognize them.
Now you're asking yourself, "She's read DICKENS. She enjoyed AUSTEN. How can she enjoy reading something like that?"
The honest truth is that I don't know. But I'm really excited that I might get the third book in the Saga.
I'm not going to recommend or not recommend this story to you.
Showing posts with label Author Rant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Author Rant. Show all posts
Monday, January 24, 2011
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Author Rant is Back On
Because recently I've picked up watching this YouTube channel called charlieissocoollike and I stared watching it because of Trock, which is Time Lord Rock, for any of you who were wondering. I'm a geek, so obviously I listen to this stuff. If you haven't figured out I'm a geek, I am. I mean, I read classic literature for fun...
Okay, but charlieissocoollike is in a Trock band called Chameleon Circuit (listening to this band taught me to spell those two words!) with this other YouTube video blogger called nerimon (and a couple other guys) and I just found that he read Twilight himself earlier this year. And his commentary is awesome! The link above is to the first chapter, actually. I loved listening to it, so you know what, I decided to go ahead and tell you that I'm gonna start picking on the characters for this next Sunday. Whoo! I'm excited. Here are a few phrases I plan on using.
1.) Edward Cullen, put simply, is a creeper.
2.) The first Mario had more dimensions than Bella Swan.
3.) YES! A VAMPIRE WHO REALLY WANTS TO BE CREEPY!!!!
4.) I mean, really Jacob, get a life. She's not worth it...
Okay, but charlieissocoollike is in a Trock band called Chameleon Circuit (listening to this band taught me to spell those two words!) with this other YouTube video blogger called nerimon (and a couple other guys) and I just found that he read Twilight himself earlier this year. And his commentary is awesome! The link above is to the first chapter, actually. I loved listening to it, so you know what, I decided to go ahead and tell you that I'm gonna start picking on the characters for this next Sunday. Whoo! I'm excited. Here are a few phrases I plan on using.
1.) Edward Cullen, put simply, is a creeper.
2.) The first Mario had more dimensions than Bella Swan.
3.) YES! A VAMPIRE WHO REALLY WANTS TO BE CREEPY!!!!
4.) I mean, really Jacob, get a life. She's not worth it...
Are you excited? I am! Yeah!
RIGHT! Fan Fiction stuff now...
RIGHT! Fan Fiction stuff now...
Okay, I commented in either the end or, just you know, on the replies I send out for the reviewers (I DO SEND THOSE OUT! WITH TEA! But only if you actually have an account on fanfiction, which I do strongly recommend getting. If you do review and don't have an account, then comment here and I will respond! WITH TEA!) that this Angels of the Disc was not going to be Doctor centric. It's Susan centric and her flying the TARDIS with a surprise guest! So go click on the link to find out who! On other points I had a lot of fun writing it, I got to include DEATH, and it's fun to read.
Okay, I've got to tell you, this next chapter with Jane and The Doctor from A Blue TARDIS at Red Sunset has a good deal of really interesting metaphors. I loved writing them down, because metaphors ARE AWESOME! I love metaphors that aren't not supposed to be there. Mine are all really obvious. If you don't catch them, I will worry for you. I'll get this TWANG in my mind that there is someone who doesn't get the metaphor, and then I start to worry a lot. It starts off as The Doctor Reminiscing, there's a minor flash of Doctor-Lisbon background, then it switches over to Lisbon yelling because, as we learned in the last chapter, the Doctor and Jane went off to go get the TARDIS without telling her. Which is actually pretty funny. Well, I think so.
Also, I've got up two new short stories for the Doctor Who page (I plan on branching out a bit once I'm done with those two long stories, promise. I've got two other ones on hiatus) One short story is called Nice is a Nice Place to Meet, and is actually the second story I typed up and published, but the one I've been thinking a lot about for a few months. It's the one I decided to post because I got 1000 readers to my pages(thank you to everyone who helped make that up) and it's a story about Donna Noble, a Tenth Doctor's companion meeting the Ninth Doctor before Rose. If I had to stop and think I'd say it'd end up on my list of my favorite one-shots, and probably ahead of some of my longer ones as well.
The other one isn't fully mine; it was written mostly over Facebook with my best friend and sometime Beta Reader. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas is actually about a drunk Doctor and Amy Pond singing. It was inspired by the Doctor Who cast singing that song, and there is a video on YouTube. The story itself is actually very funny, and a really good read. So please take the chance to go look at it! It's actually the first bit of collaboration that I've worked on and it's ended well. We've tried original stuff, I've tried to work with my sister, but nothing ever seemed to come of it. But who knows? Now that we've done this we might be able to get around to some original work.
Speaking of original work, I've finished a short story! It was really fun to write, and I doubt I'll publish it any where soon, but if I get enough requests, I'll post it here!
You might be wondering about Electricity, and you shouldn't. I've been really busy lately, so it got pushed to the side.
I'm sick as I'm writing this, but I wanted to make sure I had something to put up here when the time came, so this is it! It's long and rambling because when I'm sick I just type a lot. But this is going up because I'm dedicated like that.
Also, Tea tastes really bitter plain. Usually, I throw in sweetener like sugar or honey(when I'm sick, like I am) and milk, but I had to run out of the kitchen because I sit in front of the oven, and food had to be made.
Okay, I've got to tell you, this next chapter with Jane and The Doctor from A Blue TARDIS at Red Sunset has a good deal of really interesting metaphors. I loved writing them down, because metaphors ARE AWESOME! I love metaphors that aren't not supposed to be there. Mine are all really obvious. If you don't catch them, I will worry for you. I'll get this TWANG in my mind that there is someone who doesn't get the metaphor, and then I start to worry a lot. It starts off as The Doctor Reminiscing, there's a minor flash of Doctor-Lisbon background, then it switches over to Lisbon yelling because, as we learned in the last chapter, the Doctor and Jane went off to go get the TARDIS without telling her. Which is actually pretty funny. Well, I think so.
Also, I've got up two new short stories for the Doctor Who page (I plan on branching out a bit once I'm done with those two long stories, promise. I've got two other ones on hiatus) One short story is called Nice is a Nice Place to Meet, and is actually the second story I typed up and published, but the one I've been thinking a lot about for a few months. It's the one I decided to post because I got 1000 readers to my pages(thank you to everyone who helped make that up) and it's a story about Donna Noble, a Tenth Doctor's companion meeting the Ninth Doctor before Rose. If I had to stop and think I'd say it'd end up on my list of my favorite one-shots, and probably ahead of some of my longer ones as well.
The other one isn't fully mine; it was written mostly over Facebook with my best friend and sometime Beta Reader. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas is actually about a drunk Doctor and Amy Pond singing. It was inspired by the Doctor Who cast singing that song, and there is a video on YouTube. The story itself is actually very funny, and a really good read. So please take the chance to go look at it! It's actually the first bit of collaboration that I've worked on and it's ended well. We've tried original stuff, I've tried to work with my sister, but nothing ever seemed to come of it. But who knows? Now that we've done this we might be able to get around to some original work.
Speaking of original work, I've finished a short story! It was really fun to write, and I doubt I'll publish it any where soon, but if I get enough requests, I'll post it here!
You might be wondering about Electricity, and you shouldn't. I've been really busy lately, so it got pushed to the side.
I'm sick as I'm writing this, but I wanted to make sure I had something to put up here when the time came, so this is it! It's long and rambling because when I'm sick I just type a lot. But this is going up because I'm dedicated like that.
Also, Tea tastes really bitter plain. Usually, I throw in sweetener like sugar or honey(when I'm sick, like I am) and milk, but I had to run out of the kitchen because I sit in front of the oven, and food had to be made.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Stephanie Myer:Part One: Plot
To start with, I have read the Twilight series. I'm not one to get annoyed at something I haven't read. I read it just once, at my sister's instance. But to make certain I'm not yelled at by anyone claiming I don't know what I'm talking about, I do.
And the main idea of this post is this: Twilight and it's creator suck.
Not the most elegant way to phrase it, I know, but that's the honest to god truth. This is just part one of my rant on the series, and that is because I could discuss and rant for about ten typed pages on why I hate Twilight. This post will be about the plot and how I consider Stephanie Myer a thief. A dirty rotten no good, down-right thief.
Let's start with a basic overview of the series.
TWILIGHT: Isabella Swan is a teenager who goes to live with her dad and not with her newly-wedded mom. And so her story begins; and she moves to a town smaller than can be imagined. When she arrives, she meets all sorts of wonderful people; Jessica, Tyler(his van...one of my favorite characters...), Jacob Black, and Edward Cullen. Edward Cullen turns out to be be a vampire-and her basic reaction is, "Oh! You're a vampire who could end up killing me! That is so HOT! Let's get married!" And then, cue the evil vampires, Bella dumbly walks into trouble, and almost dies-but enter hot vampire hero, stage left! Bella gets saved, and we poor readers are in for the next novel.
NEW MOON: In which Edward decides to leave because of how dangerous for Bella to be near him, and Bella takes up extreme sports. She grows closer to Jacob Black, who turns into a werewolf every now and then, and also happens to have a crush on her. Well, Bella starts having visions of Edward when almost killing herself, so decides to keep upping the danger level. Well, Alice(another vampire) sees Bella jump off a cliff, and tells Edward that Bella killed herself, so, rashly deciding he cannot live with out her(Did I mention that she's 17 and he's 119? You'd think he'd have practice...) he decides to go the head honchos of the vampires to get himself killed. Well, enter heroine stage right, and Edward gets saved. But wait, there's more...
ECLIPSE: NEWSFLASH! Vampires and werewolves don't get along! Bella is torn between her best friend and her one true love. Until the evil vampire's mate comes back, intent on killing Bella. This new danger requires the two to work together. Well, when preparing for the battle, Bella decides to be selfish and begs Edward to stay with her...and how can you say no to those big puppy dog eyes? Well, it's a good thing he does, because evil vampire two runs across them, and where would we be with out a big battle scene? Well, long story short, Bella lives for one more book...
BREAKING DAWN: Bella and Edward get marry...and Bella get pregnant. Bet you thought that couldn't happen, huh? Well, usually the human mom doesn't survive because Baby Vampire rips it's way out of the mom's stomach! Well, unfortunately, Bella lives and gets turned into a vampire herself. But someone sees baby Vampire, Nessie, and thinks that it's not gonna grow up-and that's BAD~ Cause she goes and tells Head Vampire Honchos, who decide to kill Nessie and everyone else...So to save the baby, the Cullens decide to get every vampire friend they have! This results in a stand off, the appearance of another Vampire Baby, and once again, Bella doesn't die. Good news, though, Jacob is in love with vampire baby and quits mooning (pun intended) over Bella. And they all live happily ever after.
And when I put it that way, the entire plot sounds like a really bad harlequin romance novel...oh, wait... sorry, it is. The problem with Stephanie Myer is that these aren't even original plot lines...which with harlequin novels that are advertised as that sort of novel, it's okay. But I should hope that writers who are writing for Young adults would attempt to advance the reading minds-not bore them into oblivion. To make the matter worse these aren't even HER unoriginal plot lines-she was 'inspired' by another's works-Shakespeare, Austen and Bronte should all be turning in their graves.
She claims Shakespeare using Romeo and Juliet and A Mid-Summer Night's dream. And I've also read both of those-wonderful, and interesting. However, Myers does not only take inspiration from them, but goes as far as quoting Romeo and Juliet. In the same novel. That I just can't sanction. The division between her best friend and love, is so obviously like Tybalt and Romeo...Gah. I can't stand it.
And please, couldn't she have let Pride and Prejudice alone? I mean, just saying that she used it as inspiration is insulting to Jane Austen. If you couldn't tell before, I'm a big fan. But when a girl who doesn't fit one society first rejects, then gets rejected, then becomes friends with the love's sister, and then the heroine and the love interest end up together, that's just stealing! And a point of pride for an author is having an original plot line. I mean, I'm not a big fan of Emily Bronte, but her works should be left alone too...
These authors, in their after-life, must be joining up against Stephanie Myer in the after life. There will be a reckoning.
And the main idea of this post is this: Twilight and it's creator suck.
Not the most elegant way to phrase it, I know, but that's the honest to god truth. This is just part one of my rant on the series, and that is because I could discuss and rant for about ten typed pages on why I hate Twilight. This post will be about the plot and how I consider Stephanie Myer a thief. A dirty rotten no good, down-right thief.
Let's start with a basic overview of the series.
TWILIGHT: Isabella Swan is a teenager who goes to live with her dad and not with her newly-wedded mom. And so her story begins; and she moves to a town smaller than can be imagined. When she arrives, she meets all sorts of wonderful people; Jessica, Tyler(his van...one of my favorite characters...), Jacob Black, and Edward Cullen. Edward Cullen turns out to be be a vampire-and her basic reaction is, "Oh! You're a vampire who could end up killing me! That is so HOT! Let's get married!" And then, cue the evil vampires, Bella dumbly walks into trouble, and almost dies-but enter hot vampire hero, stage left! Bella gets saved, and we poor readers are in for the next novel.
NEW MOON: In which Edward decides to leave because of how dangerous for Bella to be near him, and Bella takes up extreme sports. She grows closer to Jacob Black, who turns into a werewolf every now and then, and also happens to have a crush on her. Well, Bella starts having visions of Edward when almost killing herself, so decides to keep upping the danger level. Well, Alice(another vampire) sees Bella jump off a cliff, and tells Edward that Bella killed herself, so, rashly deciding he cannot live with out her(Did I mention that she's 17 and he's 119? You'd think he'd have practice...) he decides to go the head honchos of the vampires to get himself killed. Well, enter heroine stage right, and Edward gets saved. But wait, there's more...
ECLIPSE: NEWSFLASH! Vampires and werewolves don't get along! Bella is torn between her best friend and her one true love. Until the evil vampire's mate comes back, intent on killing Bella. This new danger requires the two to work together. Well, when preparing for the battle, Bella decides to be selfish and begs Edward to stay with her...and how can you say no to those big puppy dog eyes? Well, it's a good thing he does, because evil vampire two runs across them, and where would we be with out a big battle scene? Well, long story short, Bella lives for one more book...
BREAKING DAWN: Bella and Edward get marry...and Bella get pregnant. Bet you thought that couldn't happen, huh? Well, usually the human mom doesn't survive because Baby Vampire rips it's way out of the mom's stomach! Well, unfortunately, Bella lives and gets turned into a vampire herself. But someone sees baby Vampire, Nessie, and thinks that it's not gonna grow up-and that's BAD~ Cause she goes and tells Head Vampire Honchos, who decide to kill Nessie and everyone else...So to save the baby, the Cullens decide to get every vampire friend they have! This results in a stand off, the appearance of another Vampire Baby, and once again, Bella doesn't die. Good news, though, Jacob is in love with vampire baby and quits mooning (pun intended) over Bella. And they all live happily ever after.
And when I put it that way, the entire plot sounds like a really bad harlequin romance novel...oh, wait... sorry, it is. The problem with Stephanie Myer is that these aren't even original plot lines...which with harlequin novels that are advertised as that sort of novel, it's okay. But I should hope that writers who are writing for Young adults would attempt to advance the reading minds-not bore them into oblivion. To make the matter worse these aren't even HER unoriginal plot lines-she was 'inspired' by another's works-Shakespeare, Austen and Bronte should all be turning in their graves.
She claims Shakespeare using Romeo and Juliet and A Mid-Summer Night's dream. And I've also read both of those-wonderful, and interesting. However, Myers does not only take inspiration from them, but goes as far as quoting Romeo and Juliet. In the same novel. That I just can't sanction. The division between her best friend and love, is so obviously like Tybalt and Romeo...Gah. I can't stand it.
And please, couldn't she have let Pride and Prejudice alone? I mean, just saying that she used it as inspiration is insulting to Jane Austen. If you couldn't tell before, I'm a big fan. But when a girl who doesn't fit one society first rejects, then gets rejected, then becomes friends with the love's sister, and then the heroine and the love interest end up together, that's just stealing! And a point of pride for an author is having an original plot line. I mean, I'm not a big fan of Emily Bronte, but her works should be left alone too...
These authors, in their after-life, must be joining up against Stephanie Myer in the after life. There will be a reckoning.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Introduction of the Author Rant
I can't read Emma this week, not fully. I have to read Book Three of Gulliver's Travels this week, and am taking it upon myself to write out notes for everyone in my group per chapter. I hope to get it finished so I can have something for you the next week. This week, instead, I'll take the chance to rant about an author I'm not particularly fond of. The obvious choice: Stephanie Myer. To be honest, it could just be "Stephanie Myer Rant: Part 1", because there is so much I don't like. I've probably just really annoyed someone, but, oh well. I'm not a fan of her's-her novels are just harlequin novels for teens. And rather dull, without any real point. But I'll get into that on Sunday.
But, on the upside, I did get my stories up on time, and am having fun working on a new idea for my school's drama production that is run by students. I've gotten one monologue and one play written and approved, and this monologue in the works. I'm really working on concepts, instead of saying right out what I want people to think about. It's fun.
Once again, sorry about the delay on Emma; but I promise to make my rant entertaining!
But, on the upside, I did get my stories up on time, and am having fun working on a new idea for my school's drama production that is run by students. I've gotten one monologue and one play written and approved, and this monologue in the works. I'm really working on concepts, instead of saying right out what I want people to think about. It's fun.
Once again, sorry about the delay on Emma; but I promise to make my rant entertaining!
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